Going on the grief offence.
This interview came up on my instagram feed this morning. Eleven seconds in I was crying. [Yes. Back-to-back posts where I am crying. It was the good kind of tears this time. Don’t worry. I am okay. Promise.] I have watched it at least a dozen times since and I am still taken by the message.
For so many years, grief had a hold on me. I lived in its shadow. The immensity of Emma’s death was bigger than I could bare. Every so often, I’d dip a toe in the waters of reality, hoping that I might be able finally what had happened, but the pain was almost always too overwhelming. I feared that if I let myself fully surrender, I would never find my way back.
What I find beautiful about this video is the simplicity of the message. Going on the offensive in your grief, is akin to finding ways to honour your loved one. Celebrating them on your terms, not waiting for the conventional anniversary or birthday. It is continuing to make your loved one a part of your life.
All day I have been thinking about ways I could go on the offensive. About things that Emma loved that I could share with the world. I have also be thinking about some other pretty special people in my life that have died — people that I carry with me and that I want to honour this way. Being willing to live in a way that makes you open to these moments not only provides you with “sweet remembrances” of your loved one as Andy explains in this interview, but also the opportunity for genuine connection with others.
What does going on the offensive look like for you?
“Grief doesn’t have to be something that hits you when you are not ready for it.”
*NB: If you have read my About Me section you know I know little about pop culture so this post in no way endorses Andy Grammer or his music. #sorrynotsorryAG In fact, my husband reminded me of his catchy yet incredibly bothersome song a couple years. I am limiting my interest to his views on grief.
